Monday, March 13, 2006

Monday Memory #3

The Time My Mother Found My Birth Control Pills

Oh, the naivete of youth! I was home for a weekend during college and had brazenly left my little packet of birth control pills on my nightstand in my bedroom.

I didn't see any need to hide them because my mother was a pharmacist. So I stupidly assumed she'd be PROUD of me for being responsible and taking care of things on my own.

Ah, no. Because she was a mother before she was a pharmacist and the "mother" reacted, not the pharmacist. Oops. Needless to say, she was quite upset and a BIG lecture occurred.

The funny thing was, about 5 or 6 years later she handed me a big brown paper bag and said, "Don't open it until you get home." I was at my parents' house for dinner. So, curiousity aroused, I tore into the bag as soon as I left their street. Oh my God!! It was a bag full of condoms. And not just regular 'ol condoms but brightly colored ones and all sorts of variations I won't go into.

Come to find out she had just been in Las Vegas at a big pharmacy convention - and this is what she brings home to her daughter. I guess she figured I was beyond redemption so she better make sure I was as prepared as possible. To this day we never talk about "that bag."

Links to other Monday Memories (If you participate, drop me a line in the comments & I'll link you up)
Lady Bug


Blogger Lazy Daisy said...

Wow, way too funny. I've been married 32 years and my mom still doesn't know that I have sex with Mr. Wonderful (I'm not sure how she thinks my kids came into being.) Good post.

3/13/2006 10:55 AM  
Blogger mar said...

Great post, loved it! the mother comes before any profession, lol!

3/13/2006 11:32 AM  
Blogger Norma said...

Once a mom, always a mom--but I don't think mine would have done that. She just sent me religious literature.

Thanks for stopping by.

3/13/2006 11:37 AM  
Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

Ah..."the paper bag"...I wonder where she got such varieties?

3/13/2006 3:32 PM  
Anonymous Libragirl said...

That's hysterical. My parents have always known I'm on birth control. I've been on it since I was 15 (for medical reasons, I swear) but I can't see my parents ever handing me a bag of condoms

3/13/2006 4:48 PM  
Blogger Jess and Jetta said...

My parents would freak out if they saw me just holding a guy's hand! Thanks for the laugh :)

3/13/2006 5:35 PM  
Blogger WendyWings said...

LOL my parents would have been THRILLED to see I was on birth control, I was a disappointment to my hippy parents I got married a virgin ROTFL

3/13/2006 6:28 PM  
Blogger kdubs said...

Well and this is my point. We often say it doesn't matter if we agree or not, if the teenager is gonna do it--- he/she should be prepared and safe. Can you imagine our kids? Uggh.> LOLOL..

3/13/2006 8:24 PM  
Blogger Barbara said...

What were you thinking? I've never had a discussion about birth control with my parents, I can't even imagine it. Thanks for making me laugh today!

3/13/2006 9:54 PM  
Blogger Just another American Expat said...

My Mom found my "pipe" in my nightstand once, but she never filled it for me. How dissapointing.

3/14/2006 2:38 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

LOLOL!! Isn't it funny how moms are MOMS before anything else? heehee

3/14/2006 3:21 AM  
Blogger Dawn said...

That was too funny. To this day I still can't talk about stuff like that with my mom. It was a no no subject, maybe that's why I ended up being a wild child for many years:)

3/14/2006 10:38 AM  
Blogger FRIDAY'S CHILD said...

I would have been shocked and furious too if I found out my daughter is on pills. Never would I encourage her with condoms.

3/14/2006 11:28 AM  
Blogger Writer Mom said...

Great memory! Especially the mother/daughter dynamics. I haven't allowed myself to think too much about my approach on the sex topic, but I've worried it will come up early, like age 11 or some horrifying young age. Probably, it will go the other way. Some awkward future meal when her angst ridden teenage logic will yell out, "It's so embarrassing. You were such a slut!" Something cheery like that. And of course, my response will begin, "But in MY day..." Oh, boy.

3/14/2006 12:37 PM  
Blogger Katherine said...

Friday's Child - my mother was NOT encouraging me with the condoms. It was her way of saying (without having to say) I know you have sex so be careful. If you really think you can prevent your child from having sex - good luck. You can only raise him/her the best you can and pass on your beliefs, but ultimately the decision will be theirs to make.

3/14/2006 12:44 PM  

<< Home