Sunday, December 10, 2006

More Stupid People

OK, fasten your seatbelts, here I go again - rant time!! It's been at least a couple of days, right? I'm allowed to resume ranting at whim, it's what I do.

Of course, I say "rant" and you might call it something a little less positive, maybe "diatribe." No matter, you say "to-may-toe, I say "to-mah-toe"; you say "po-tay-toe," I say, "fuck you."

So here's the deal-o: Big time important head honcho dude of Goya Foods hires a wild-animal business to bring WILD animals to his 7-year-old daughter's birthday party. You really don't need me to tell you what happened next but let me do so in vivid sarcastic detail anyway.

Yep, a 4-year-old girl was severely mauled. Luckily, she'll live although her face will be terribly scarred for life. The cougar was destroyed.

OK, there are SO many things wrong with this story my head just spun around and asked itself if it actually just read what it thought it did. Unfortunately, yes. So let's review:

1) What idiot in his right mind would think it's a good idea to have WILD animals at a party where young children will be running and screaming? Most people know it's not a good idea to mix WILD animals and children, let alone provoke said animals with high-pitched shrilling and running. 'Cause gee, I don't know, running is what a cougar's prey does, asshat.

2) Why is there even a WILD animal company whose business is "renting" out WILD animals? They are WILD. If I say this elventy seven more time will idiots pay attention?? Probably not, but let me try. What really do people expect when they "rent" WILD animals? Did they expect that anyone, no matter how much they call themselves an expert, an animal trainer, or a jackass could possibly take a WILD animal and make it tame? After beating it into submission countless times, I'm sure the animal may appear to be tame and under your control but guess what? It's just bidding its time. Is this not one of those unwritten laws? Who doesn't know this? It's like when you're watching a horror movie and the somehow unsuspecting victim-to-be decides to explore the house instead of running for her life when she hears a noise.

3) The cougar was put down. See, I really have a problem with this. Why are they blaming the cougar for doing what a WILD cougar does? You cannot take the instinct out of a wild animal! Now, they said they killed the cougar to see if it had rabies - it did not. Sure, uh huh, because of course it had to be rabies or some other terrible disease that would cause this WILD animal that was certainly under your control to attack. Also, last time I checked, there are vaccinations for rabies. So gee, let's see now, if you're going to be bringing around an animal that could possibly be in contact with people why wouldn't you just vaccinate it ahead of time? Heck, no big deal, we'll just kill it if anything happens.

I'm annoyed, people, so annoyed.

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