Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Put Down the Stupid Phone

Grrrrrrrrrr

I made a lovely HOMEMADE pizza for dinner last night (OK, the crust was actually Boobobolli or whatever) and just when Husband and I had taken all of two bites his cell phone rings. This was beyond annoying to me since it has been happening more and more to the point where at least 3 evenings during the work week he gets "after hours" calls that seem to occur during dinner. I have no problem with him taking work calls at home - I just ask that he wait 15 freakin' minutes until we're done with dinner to return the calls.

But nooooooooooooo, there's always a good excuse. "I had to take this call. This woman left work today and had to go to the emergency room" Big deal! I spent 15 minutes putting together this HOMEMADE pizza!

OK, I didn't really say that...because in this case the woman actually did go to the emergency room...but my point is that there is always an excuse as to why he HAS to take the call immediately instead of waiting until we're done eating. I just think it's disrespectful to me. Especially since EVERY night after dinner he spends 2-3 hours on his laptop and all I get are grunts in response to any question asked while he's merrily clicking away.

So, he's talking away while I finish my pizza (damn good if I do say so myself). The steam is starting to come out of my ears because we have talked about answering the cell phone during dinner before. I pick up his dish of pizza and look at the dog. Sampson starts to drool...do I dare? I look at the garbage can, look back at the dog, his tail has started to go a mile a minute - for the love of God, the DOG can read my mind better than my husband. But no, I decide the pizza is probably too spicy for the dog and put the plate back down. Sampson sighs and puts his head on his paws.

The whole talking on the cell phone during dinner thing is becoming part of a very disturbing trend where I seem to be able to only talk to my husband on the weekend. And even then he'll work several hours each day. I appreciate that he works hard, but I don't like being taken for granted. So, I told him that and after only 10 minutes of me pouting (this man is a very fast learner) he apologized. His words, "I know I have a problem disengaging from work." haha. I just had to laugh - who talks like that?? He's spending waaaaaay too much time at work picking up stupidass jargon.

So, we're cool until the next time he even tries to answer a call during dinner because the dog is definitely getting his dinner then. :)

Are you sick? Let me sniff you...

I read such an amazing story in the newspaper this morning, "Dogs nearly perfect in sniffing cancers".

Apparently, a clinic in CA has trained 5 dogs (3 labs and 2 Portuguese Water Dogs) to detect lung cancer with 99% accuracy. 99% accuracy!! The dogs are able to detect the cancer by smelling people's breath. They were also able to detect breast cancer with 88% accuracy which apparently is the same percentage of accuracy that a mammogram is able to detect it.

Gee, if given a choice, I'd much rather have a dog smell my breath than have my boobs squished and squashed during a mammogram. But hey, that's just me!

In this study, the five dogs were borrowed from owners and Guide Dogs for the Blind. David, Juliar and Jess and Jetta - if you're reading, have you ever heard about this? And what about you, Hank? I'm sure you could do this if you tried 'cause you're so smart. The dogs were trained to sniff as if they were detecting for bombs. They repeatedly heard a clicker and got a treat when they found a desired odor in many identical smelling spots.

Truly amazing! Treat your pets well - who knows, they may save your life some day. Sampson just enjoys sniffing Fluffy right now, but you never know...

Monday, January 30, 2006

Girl's Weekend

Well, as promised, I am reporting about my "Girl's Weekend" with my friend Kira.

We had a great time and a wonderful spa experience although as you can see from this picture, I managed once again (actually this is the third time) to have the oh so delicate skin below my eyebrows ripped off. OUCH. We determined it can in no way be my fault, and therefore, I should probably just stop having brow waxes. Ever. Clearly, my skin does not like it. This picture doesn't even do justice to how red and raw my skin looks. But, the heated hand and feet mitts during the facial just about made up for the skin ripping incident.

Despite losing all feeling in the eyebrow area, I still managed do some serious damage shopping. Husband was smart enough to keep his mouth shut since he's going on his annual Guy's Golf Trip next weekend. HA - what great timing for my friend to come visit you say. Ah yes, all part of a carefully executed plan I say. :)

It was wonderful to just spend time talking with a good friend. We also managed to drink a few martinis. We always try out a new one each time we visit each other. This visit's martini was so successful I have to share the recipe:

Pomegranate Martini
1 1/2 cups of Pom juice
2 oz. Absolut Citron
1 oz. Cointreau
Juice of 1/2 a lemon or lime

Saturday, January 28, 2006

The Bitch from Virginia

Ah ha! I remember what I was going to post about yesterday before I got so distracted by peanut butter... My bestest buddy Kira is coming to visit - yippee!

We've been friends for about 15 years every since we met at the Big Established Good 'Ol Boy Insurance Company that she still works for and I can't convince her to leave...Actually, she still works there because they pay her a lot of damn money for making her move every two years. I've calculated that between her moves and my Husband's company making us move every two years, in approximately 2010 we should be within about 3 hours of each other. OK, I suck at math so I was really just making that up. Wishful thinking that we ever might live in the same town again. Oh, the good all days of giving ourselves manis and pedis while watching Melrose Place and gossiping about everyone we know, sigh.

Anyhoo, we're going to do the Total Girls Weekend thing complete with a spa day. The "spa day" is actually a big joke between us since something terrible always happens to one of us when we go together, yet we persist in this dangerous yet addictive behavior. Last time it was Kira's turn. While in rooms next to each other having facials I hear a thud and then a scream. Knowing my friend so well, I know that was not her screaming so it had to have been her asthetician. Hmm, are her eyebrows really that scary? I mean sure, it's been weeks since she waxed them but really! When I'm done I find Kira in the reception room holding a big ice bag on her face. Apparently, during her facial the light by the cot fell on her face! (Her asthetician screamed in horror upon seeing the big 'ol lump above her eye - and I'm sure was afraid she'd get sued.) And get this, do you think they give her the facial for free? Nooooooooo, they give her a stupid $25 gift card - worthless since she doesn't even live in the freaking state and neither one of us are going back there anyway! She ended up with a black eye and no one at work believed her spa story. They were SURE she was being abused...OH, did we laugh over martinis...

My spa story isn't so dramatic. I just didn't know that there were certain lotions and potions you apparently cannot put on your face within 3 days of having a brow wax. When you do, it causes your skin to come off along with the brow hair. OUCH! But more importantly, I looked like some kind of circus clown on meth...I had these very odd comma shaped red patches underneath my eyebrows where about 3 layers of skin were missing. After a couple of days the skin there turned brown and came off in one big piece. Cool. AND, I didn't have to pay for the brow massacre since the asthetician forgot to ask me if I had used any of the "banned" lotions/potions on my face within 3 days.

Yep, she's a great friend even if she is a size ZERO. Yes, that's right. There is such a size and she's proof. I love to hate her. Can you imagine shopping with this chick? We actually had to go to Limited Too one time to find shorts that would fit her. Bitch. Yep, blonde, green eyes, size 0 and she has Big Boobs. I'm surprised she has any friends at all. Here's a picture so you all can hate her, too. Yes, again we are drinking martinis but I don't happen to have any pictures of us when we're not...

Funny thing about Kira...she thinks Big Brother is always watching her. Meaning, she's convinced her company regularly reads her email. I'm not saying they don't, but I think by now she'd know if they were. Just to drive her crazy, when we working there I would send her emails where I repeatedly wrote the word VODKA in about 36 point type and talked about all the sex she was having with her 10 boyfriends. She would freak out, immeditely delete the email and then go and delete it from her recycle bin. Yea, like that was gonna really get rid of it. Then she would call me and beg me NEVER to do that again. Oh, it was just too easy.

So, I'll be sure to post on Monday and you let know about any spa injuries. Afterall, it is my turn, fair is fair.

Friday, January 27, 2006

"Naturally" Healthy

Is it a bad thing to eat an entire jar of peanut butter in a week? I mean, if there are degrees of "wrongness", how wrong is it really?

What if I tell you that it's the "natural kind"? You know, just naturally really high fat peanuts and natural salt from the uh, natural Earth. In which case the salt is probably so polluted that next year "they" will discover it causes cancer. You know, like eggs, red meat, cheese, blah blah blah. Go eat some broccoli and stop telling us how we're killing ourselves by eating food that tastes good!

But, I digress. This wasn't really going to be a post about peanut butter except that I just finished the jar and felt a tad guilty about it. I promise to get on the stupid treadmill later so back off!

OK, just one more thing about peanut butter. I have created this "dessert" that I'm sure is so healthy that I've convinced myself it's OK to eat it at least twice a day as "snacks". Because I love you all so much, I will share the recipe.

Put a handful of chocolate chips in a bowl. Now, for this to be "healthy" they have to be the dark chocolate (semi-sweet) kind since now we know that dark chocolate is actually GOOD for you, woo hoo, best news I've heard in years. It's cheating if you use the milk chocolate ones but wow do they taste good! OK, so then add a couple of tablespoons of peanut butter - the "natural" kind of course. Nuke that for about 40 seconds and then stir in Kashi Go Lean cereal. You know, that high protein-high fiber-tastes like cardboard-cereal - unless it's mixed with PB and chocolate. I mean really, anything mixed with PB and chocolate is going to be down right tasty!

I know you're saying, "Euuuwww, gross" but it's actually good. I have Husband hooked on it although he uses the sugar added peanut butter...tsk tsk

Hmm, forgot what I was actually going to post about today... Am I the only one that makes up really weird food combos? Tell me about yours! Don't make me feel like a freak alone. :)

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Thirteen TV Shows I Admit I Watch

Thirteen TV Shows I Admit I Watch
Yes, I know it's ridiculous that I can say I watch this many TV shows with some regularity! In my defense (or maybe this is just me being weird), I always have a book in my hand while watching TV. If the show is really good, though, I admit that I only read during the commercials. I used to get so annoyed with my husband when he channel flipped nonstop during commercials. Then he said, "How is it any different than you reading during the commercials?" Damn, good point (not that I admitted that, of course)!
  1. CSI (only the original)
  2. Scrubs
  3. Grey's Anatomy (my favorite show currently)
  4. What Not to Wear (Hey, it's educational!)
  5. Oprah
  6. NCIS (that Mark Harmon is HOT)
  7. My Name is Earl
  8. American Idol (I know, I know)
  9. House
  10. The Book of Daniel (new show, I'm very impressed with how they get away with linking the Catholic Church to the mob - outrageous! Ack - JUST read it's been pulled. Wow, guess they didn't "get away with it" afterall. The Church has WAY too much power but that's another post)
  11. NBC Evening News with Brian Williams (reaching here but I've run out of "regulars")
  12. The Office (I don't think it's as funny as My Name is Earl)
  13. Dancing With the Stars (oh, just shoot me now)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well!

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

No Name Calling Week

It's National No Name Calling Week!

Did everyone know or am I the only one that had to find out by reading it in the paper? Maybe because I'm not a mom...So, moms tell me - are the schools making a big deal about it? I really, really hope so.

I have to be honest and say I never really liked school until I got to college. I had friends, thank goodness, but we were never in the "popular" clique. And if you weren't in the popular clique, well then you were just losers. Everybody knew it. School was so hard - all the peer pressure and worrying about how to fit in. Conformity was IN, individuality was OUT until you got to college (at least at my college, I think because it was so big - 40,000 undergrad).

I've never told anyone this and I'm actually a little scared to write it down and put it out there for everyone to see how silly I am. ****Warning to David to stop reading because I'm sharing a private thought.**** One of the reasons I believe that I've never wanted to have kids is because I don't know if I could bear seeing my children go through some of the things I did. It was such a awkward time (middle school and high school) and I hated it so much that I wouldn't ever want to put my own children through it. How do you bear it when other kids are mean to your kids? I know all kids have to go through it, and maybe it's a good thing because it helps them learn how to deal with difficult situations.

I also believe that parents' responses to their kids pain, or are we calling it "agnst" these days, play a HUGE role in their ability to deal with hurtful situations with other kids. I also wonder if my mom had been more sensitive would I feel differently. That's a big admission for me. I'm not saying she was a "bad" mom at all, she wasn't. Just different than I wanted her to be. I wanted the kind of mom that would hold me when I cried and tell me she loved me. I wanted a mom like Lisa (you HAVE to read her post about her daughter Katie and the "mean girl"). Lisa, you're my hero!

Anyway, my lack of maternal dersires is a whole 'nother post. I'll have to really fortify myself with chocolate and margaritas before I go there...

I was just happy to read about No Name Calling Week and I've also read how schools are supposedly really cracking down on bullying. I hope that's true because bullying can really scar a kid for life. I know.

A Poptart Kind of Day

On our walk today Sampson found an entire whole poptart. You'd have thought it was filet mignon he was so excited, especially when I let him eat it - which he did in literally one big gulp.

Kind of reminded me to slow down a little and find joy in the little things around me. Not think so much about the future, like once we move to the next city then I'll make good friends and get more involved in the community. I've always had a hard time just enjoying the here and now. So, I resolved to write down a few "little" things that I really enjoy.

  • The seat warmers in my car - couldn't get through the winter without 'em!
  • Seeing the sun rise over the lake every morning from my bedroom window
  • Watching all the ducks waddling up to the bird feeder from the lake to eat the seed the birds dropped
  • Watching the children on my street play outside together
  • Reading a good book
  • Getting a phone call or email from a friend
  • The way my husband gently puts his hand on my back while I'm in bed before he leaves for work and tells me he loves me. Every day.

Here's a picture of Sampson enjoying one of his "little things". His dog Fluffy. Fluffy was actually one of my husband's first stuff animals. My mother-in-law gave it to me at Christmas. I have no idea why and thought it was a little weird. What am I supposed to do with the thing?? So, I gave it to Sampson and he loves it. Carries it downstairs every morning and then when it's time for bed at night, carries it upstairs and lays it by his bed. Don't ask me what the heck I'm going to do when my mother-in-law comes to visit! "Uh, gee, he's never taken that stuffed animal before, I don't know what's gotten into him..."

I'm usually quite pessimistic but today I feel lucky! It's a poptart kind of day. Enjoy it! I'd love to hear little things that you all get joy from.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

A to Z, All About Me

I stole this idea from Blurbette so be sure to visit her blog!

A-Z about me:

A - Age you got your first kiss: age 15 (thanks Joe, it was great!)
B - Band/Singer listening to right now: Carbon Leaf
C- Crush: Johnny Depp. Just something smoldering and mysterious about that guy...
D- Drink of Choice: nonalcoholic - coffee. alcoholic - margaritas with lots of salt.
E - Easiest person: (To be around) My yellow lab Sampson. Yes, I know he's DOG but he acts so much like a person that he's close enough. He's so happy ALL the time it's impossible to be sad or in a bad mood when he's around.
F - Favorite food: tie between seafood and chocolate candy like Lindt's truffles
G - Good deed: I volunteer in an English as a Second Language class. I meet amazing people from all over the world who are so eager to learn.
H – Holiday Memory: Any Christmas when all my Grandparents were alive. My parents would drive 10 hrs. from IL to Pittsburgh with my brother, me and our cat in the backseat. There would be at least 20 people over for dinner every night. It was constant laughter and I always felt so happy and loved.
I - Idiosyncrasy: I don’t brush my teeth in the morning until after I've had my coffee - it ruins the taste of the coffee if I do.
J - Jewelry: Love it all! Favorite piece right now is a 60 carat blue quartz bracelet husband bought me for my birthday last year.
K-Kids: Not in the cards.
L - Longest car ride ever: 10 hours from IL to Pittsburgh several times a year to see relatives.
M - Major in college: Business Administration (boring!)
N - Nicknames: Kat (don't care for Kathy at all)
O - One wish: I wish that I'll be able to make many close friends in the next place Husband gets transferred to which could be any day now.
P - Pet Peeve: women who think they are better than me because their husband is higher on the corporate ladder and therefore, they must speak to me in the most condescending way possible, or not at all. Get over yourselves!
Q - Quote: Keep true to the dreams of thy youth. Friedrich von Schiller (1759 - 1805)
R - Reason to smile: Husband. I adore him.
S - Surprise you loved - Husband surprised me with a birthday weekend in New Orleans with friends last year. Had a blast and it was all the more meaningful because it was 3 wks. before Katrina.
T - Time you felt sad: Saturday when the two miners in WV were found dead and the whale in the Thames River in London died.
U - Unknown fact about me: I've never drank a Pepsi or Coke. I don't like anything carbonated - no soft drinks, beer or champagne!
V - Vegetable(s) you hate: Green peppers, olives (are they a veggie?).
W - Worst thing to have happened to you: Husband's company very unexpectedly demanded he move to NY (or be terminated) 3 months after we built our dream home in MD and 3 days after I started a new job I loved. Turned out great because we made wonderful friends but the first 6 months was very hard; I was depressed and cried A LOT.
Y - Your biggest regret: not joining a sorority in college because my boyfriend at the time didn't want me to. How dumb. Could have made great friends.
Z - Zoo animal you like: none. Honestly, it makes me sad to see them in cages.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

All Aboard the Woo Woo Train

**Warning - this is one of those "woo woo" stories...

The other day I was looking at some pictures and got a little teary when I came across one of my maternal Grandma. She died in 1998 the day before I moved from Illinois to Maryland. She lived in Pittsburgh and I was so excited to move to MD and be only 3 hours away from her.

She was THE stereotypical Italian grandma. Very plump, OK fat, always wore a dress with knee his rolled down to her ankles, cooked mountains of amazing pasta, meatballs, manicotta, etc., spoke in broken English, was the matriarch of the family and loved to argue. She didn't take any crap from anyone either.

I've often thought about her and wondered how she was and why I don't "feel" her or have any sign that she's around. Not that I'm psychic or anything - we had a close relationship and I just want to know she's there.

Anyway, I looked at the pictures and thought about how much I missed her. About 15 minutes later my cell phone rang - unusual in itself since I rarely use it and about only 3 people have the number. I answered and heard a woman with a strong Italian accent saying "hello, hello" and then the line went dead. Coincidence? I think not.

Anyone have any "woo woo" stories to share? I do believe that there is something after death. It would be horrible to think that's IT. I used to watch medium John Edward all the time. He was on at like 11:30 at night but I was addicted! I mean, how did he know this chick's dead uncle always had tomato sauce stains on his tie?? I also watch the show "Medium" with Patricia Arquette sometimes. It's based on the life of medium Allison DuBois who wrote Don't Kiss Them Good-bye. I've read several other books by psychics and find them interesting because they really make you think about your beliefs. They've also made me unafraid of dying.

Friday, January 20, 2006

The Poe Toaster

I find it so interesting, in a very romantic spooky kind of way, that someone has been putting 3 roses and a partially full bottle of cognac on Edgar Allan Poe's grave for 57 years. 57 years!!

To have someone care so much about you that they go through this ritual seems so endearing to me. Maybe I'm just a silly sentimental sap, but to have done something in your life that touched someone enough for them to honor you forever is fascinating.

The curator of the Poe House and Museum in Baltimore where Poe's grave is, said he had to chase people out of the graveyard so that they wouldn't interfere with the rose/cognac ceremony done on the eve of the anniversary of Poe's birth. How rude! Why are there always these yo yos that just have to know everything. What are they planning to do - tackle the poor guy and force him to say who he is and why he does this?? Why do they have to take away all of the mystery? Kind of like seducing someone naked vs. wearing some frilly, lacy, ridiculously expensive next to nothing from Victoria's Secret that at least requires some use of the imagination.

The story is that the man who originally began doing this - dubbed the "Poe Toaster" - left a note in 1993 saying, "The torch will be passed." Apparently another note years later said the man died in 1998 and his son would carry on the tradition (and he has). The significance of the cognac isn't known. I read that the three roses represent the three persons whose remains are beneath the monument: Poe, his mother-in-law (Maria Clemm) and his wife Virginia. But, I couldn't find anything that even speculated on who the person is and why he started doing this. I hope it does go on forever, with the tradition getting passed down through generations.

Whew, Glad That's Over

So happy it's Friday althought not for the usual reasons.

Last night was The Dinner. Bigwig VP took Husband and I out to dinner along with Husband's boss and wife. It was a "thank you" to Husband for doing some major dirty work no one else wanted to do. It involved him having to tell people, "Hey, you know that bonus we gave you? Well, due to a little 'ol computer glitch you actually didn't earn that so you're not getting it, and by the way, you also owe us money." Yipes.

Husband has become known as a bit of a "fixer" around the office. Very flattering but also very stressful. I'm glad he's getting recognition but I have to say, one dinner doesn't really cut it. Where's the money? Yes, I'm greedy. But, I've also seen how hard Husband has been working and how successful he's been. I mean, they piled so much on him we had VPs calling our house to make sure he was OK and not going to bolt and make them deal with the mess. We'll see how grateful they really are when raise time rolls around in a couple of months!! I'll let you know. :)

Anyway, I was quite nervous about this dinner because I knew how important it was to Husband. I wanted to make a good impression for him. I find situations where I have to make small talk with strangers extremely uncomfortable as I am very shy. I was fearful of not saying the right thing or not saying enough and have them thinking I'm snobby, blah blah blah. I just wanted it to be over!

It ended up being a 2 1/2 hour dinner...yawn...I missed CSI!! Actually, it went well, or so Husband says, and for that I was very grateful and even more grateful to have the whole thing OVER. Of course, Husband wanted to have sex when we got home. All the back slapping and numerous compliments of his amazing performance had definitely gone to his head and he was feeling quite full of himself. I, on the other hand, really needed some stress-relieving down time with a book - Husband CANNOT understand why sex isn't stress-relieving enough...SIGH

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Thirteen Things I Covet

Thirteen Things I Covet
1. Big sparkly diamonds.

2. A week long vacation somewhere - anywhere - warm with a beach, a spa for me and a golf course to keep my husband occupied. Let me know if you have suggestions!

3. A movie that's so good I actually want to spend my time and money seeing it. Again, let me know if you have suggestions!

4. The new Lancome perfume Hypnotese.

5. My dog learning to NOT pee every two houses when we walk each morning.

6. Spenser to stop meowing at the top of his lungs at 5:30 freaking a.m.

7. Being able to eat a fabulous rich, chocolate dessert without an ounce of guilt.

8. Finding something more meaningful to do with my life. This can't be IT.

9. Vodka martinis that won't give me a headache.

10. The ability to make a positive difference in someone else's life.

11. Beautiful skin.

12. Being able to grow beautiful plants without killing them. HA! Dream on...

13. My husband's ability to converse with anyone about anything anywhere. How does he do that??

Other TT13s to check out

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Get Out of My Bed!

A serious power struggle has been occuring in my household, and for once it's not between my husband and I. (I usually win by the way.)

No, this time it's between the dog (Sampson) and the cats (Hobbes and Spenser). It's really cracking me up because they're acting so like human children.

Hobbes has been trying to take over Sampson's bed. Whenever the dog isn't in it, he will sneak on it and stretch out for a nap. This encourages the other cat to saunter over and snuggle in. While they look very cute and content, they have their own bed.

Whenever the 85 lb. dog notices the cats in his bed, he looks at me and whines. What a big baby! Rarely will he ever try to get in his bed when the cats are in it. Well, one day he apparently had enough and went and sat in the cats' bed. Too funny! I love the comic relief my little menagerie provides!

The last picture is of Hobbes and Spenser in their cat bed to give you an idea of how small the bed Sampson is trying to fit into really is.







Monday, January 16, 2006

Extreme Makeunder

Off I went to the dermatologist today, full of hope for my own little non-surgical "extreme makeover". HA! I say again, HA! Apparently I am beyond the capabilities of a mere dermatologist and do indeed need a plastic surgeon.

OK, "need" may be a little strong. I will admit to "wanting" some results that apparently a dermatologist cannot provide. I wanted some kind of lift to raise my tired, droopy eyelids. I was thinking that surely Botox could do this. I mean, every women's magazine I read trumpets the miracle that is Botox. But no, apparently even Botox cannot raise my sagging brow. I would require a blethroplasty, which is eyelid surgery to remove excess skin above and/or below the eye.

So, apparently I won't be able to get an eyelid lift prior to the big dinner with Husband's boss and that boss' boss this Thursday night. And I really wanted to look my best! I thought a little Botox would do it, but unfortunately not. And somehow, I don't think I'll be having surgery prior to Thursday - or anytime thereafter for that matter. I think it's too expensive and it scares me.

Then I thought, OK, I need a little something to make me feel better. So then I asked the dermatologist to remove a small flesh colored mole on my chin. Shot down again! Apparently I am the only one able to see this mole. But I know it's there! The doctor said if it gets bigger maybe she could remove it but it wasn't worth it now for the small scar I'd end up with.

So, here I sit, completely unfulfilled in the beauty department. Of course I blame gorgeous women everywhere that I see and therefore want to look like. sigh

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Blog Question!

Quick blog question I'm sure someone more technically advanced than I can answer...

Via Settings - Comments I entered my email address so that if anyone left a comment on my blog I would get an email. (Very exciting by the way to go my email and see that someone actually commented on the mundane drivel I wrote...)

Anyway, this feature worked fine for a couple of weeks, but for some reason has now stopped working even though I haven't changed any Settings.

If anyone has any suggestions of how to get this feature working again I'd really appreciate it!

La La La La La, I'm not listening!

OK, where in the marriage handbook does it say a perfectly good husband will all the sudden stop listening when he listened fine in the beginning?

What is up with that? Does it happen in all marriages or am I just the lucky one?

Just one example: Husband was being very nice and vacuuming while I was cleaning the cats' litter boxes. I set the bag of litter on the floor while I collected the newspaper to take everything out to the trash.
ME: Uh oh, this bag of litter leaked. Bring the vacuum back here.
HUSBAND: OK

So, one would assume he brought the vacuum back to where I said, right?? I mean he said "OK" as if he listened to what I said and understood it. Nothing difficult or tricky here! But, noooooooooo...next thing I know he's put the vacuum away.
ME: uh, Honey, you didn't vacuum up this litter.
HUSBAND: What litter?
ME: I am going to rip your arm off and hit you over the head with it.
HUSBAND: What did I do??
ME: ACK! I give up.

Went and got the vacuum myself.

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Too Old to Die??

Read an interesting article in the Columbus Dispatch this morning.

It's about Death Row inmate Clarence Ray Allen in CA. His lawyers say he's too old at 75 years of age to be put to death. I'm not trying to start a whole debate on capital punishment, but what about the three people he paid to have killed? Weren't they too young to die?

I just think it's a ridiculous argument to make. Afterall, he's been on Death Row for over 23 years. At what point over all those years did he become "too old"? I'd say he's way overdue. His lawyers say he's legally blind and partially deaf so killing him amounts to the type of cruel and unusual punishment banned by the U.S. Constitution. I guess that doesn't really hold water with me. He wasn't blind or deaf when he was in jail for killing one person and ordered the death of three others.

I know some people say that he has suffered enough but I say, what about his victims. It seems that everyone is more concerned about the rights of criminals these days than the rights of the victims. When do they get their justice? The man was convicted and sentenced to die. He's been allowed to live and appeal for 23 years. When he ordered their deaths, they were only allowed to live for a few days before they were killed.

Govenor Schwarzenegger refused to grant him clemency yesterday, so unless there is a last minute reprieve from the courts, he will be put to death on Tuesday.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Gotta Go, Gotta Go, Gotta Go Right Now!

Why is it that once you reach a certain age, oh let's say mid-thirties it starts, that suddenly you can no longer sleep through the night without having to get up and pee.

What is up with that?! It's so unfair. Especially because it happens almost every night - not just when I've had a drink or two if you know what I mean. We have to deal with all the other "fun" things about getting old and now I find I either have to buy Depends or accept that I'm not going to get a good night's sleep. I'm a light sleeper, so once I'm up, I'm up for a while.

I've tried acting like a ten year old and holding it - hoping it will just go away. Sometimes that works but then a half hour later the urge is baaaaack.

I've decided I may as well multi-task in my fight against aging. Now when I get up to pee I'm going to rub some of my "sure to make you look ten years younger" cream on my face on the way back to bed!

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Thirteen Things That Annoy The Crap Outta Me

Thirteen Things That Annoy The Crap Outta Me

1. Rude customer service people who don't seem to get that it is their job to provide GOOD, FRIENDLY SERVICE.

2. Traveling by plane. Don't get me wrong - I want to be safe - but with the way security is currently handled I not only do not feel safe, I feel annoyed and irritated to be dealing with such blatant incompetence. I also don't understand how just about every airline can be facing bankruptcy with what they charge to fly.

3. I hate when I settle into my comfy chair with a book only to discover after about 10 pages it's absolute crap but since I have nothing else to read I suffer through it only to verify that yes, indeedy it sure was crap.

4. Having to go to my husband's business functions. For example, on the hottest day of the summer being required to go to the freaking zoo and make nice with 300 sweaty people I don't know.

5. My dog insisting on pooping on the only lawn for miles around whose owners are standing RIGHT THERE watching. (yes, I always have a bag, but still!)

6. Having to spend a minimum of of two hours on the phone every freaking time I have to call Dell. I am not buying another laptop from you people! P.S. Hard drives should NOT crash after two weeks.

7. Leaving the last piece of dessert for my husband and him eating it without even offering me a bite. Rude!

8. Large companies who outsource their tech support to India and then force the reps to call themselves American names. No way was I talking to "Monica". It's insulting to them and customers who know damn well they are speaking to someone in India whose first language was not English.

9. The Catholic Church. How dare they lie and cover up and then lie some more. How dare they move priests to other parishes that they know have been molesting children instead of calling the police. How dare they tell me I cannot get married in the Catholic Church unless I agree to have children. How dare they tell my sister-in-law she cannot get an annulment unless she makes a sizable donation to the church.

10. My best friend Kira's cell phone that always dies right in the middle of me telling her some long involved story only I don't know the phone is dead until AFTER I've gone on and on and on and finished the stupid story.

11. The police and firemen associations that call my house monthly and ask for money. Apparently they are exempt from the telemarketing "do not call" rule. They make me feel so guilty I give money, but I have to wonder what my tax dollars are paying for if they still have to call and ask for money.

12. Watered down drinks you pay $10 for.

13. ME. I annoy the crap out of myself by worrying too much about to damn everything. Do I look good enough? Am I smart enough to carry on a conversation with my husband's boss? Am I a good enough Corporate wife? Am I a good enough Aunt? Does anyone like me? Will anyone read the silly things I blog about? blah blah blah

Links to other Thursday Thirteens! (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

CHECK OUT THESE OTHER THURSDAY THIRTEENS

Confessions of a busy mom

Goin Ons

Life's Entertainment

Straddling the Line

Diary of the Nello

Wendy's Whimsies

Snaphappy Mom

Kimmy and Jacob

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Hands Off Bitch!

I watched the new Desperate Housewives this past Sunday and found the whole "to do" about Gabby kissing Lynette's husband Tom quite thought-provoking.

I asked some friends their opinion and it was interesting to note that my annoyingly cute, self-confident size 2 friends with fake boobs who were former cheerleaders didn't seem to have a problem with it. They said they would just laugh it off as a joke - no big deal. Then others like myself who were not part of the oh so popular "in" clique in high school (and have the boobs God gave us) thought otherwise.

I personally would find it very disrespectful if another woman kissed my husband on the mouth the way Gabby did to Tom - that wasn't a two second kiss either! Granted, I'm probably hyper sensitive, but I would see it as a slap in my face - "oh, a kiss from your wife isn't good enough to make you feel better about yourself so let me give you a real kiss from a real woman." Of course, my attitude makes the whole episode more about ME than about my husband but that's the way it should be anyway! :)

Interestingly enough, the "official" Desperate Housewives website has a poll asking if you would resent Gabby if you were Lynette. Currently, 66.1% of the 5,419 respondents say YES and only 33.8% say no, the kiss was just in good fun.

If anyone is reading, do you have any thoughts?

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Scaredy Cat

I woke up in the middle of the night. Husband was away on business. I went downstairs and walked through the dining room to get to the kitchen. I somehow sensed someone was sitting in one of the dining room chairs. I whirled and turned the light on and there was a man sitting in one of the chairs. I screamed and screamed and screamed. Then I realized he was dead - bullet hole in the head. As I was backing out of the dining room someone grabbed me from behind and stabbed me in the stomach.

I woke up screaming. Ack, why did I dream that?! Husband is leaving for a business trip tomorrow so now I am seriously freaked out. I have a dog who is a bigger baby than me and can't be counted on to protect me. Maybe he would be able to trip an intruder in his haste to get to them and lick them, but again, I can't count on that!

Haven't seen any scary movies lately...I read mysteries and sure, at least one person dies in every book but I've been reading mysteries (not horror - no Stephen King) for years and never had nightmares.

I'm convinced this nightmare means something and I'm just too dense to get it.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Hangover Sunday

Ah, my old friend it's been a while - a long while - but you're back again.

Yep, one too many Pineapple-tinis. But wow they were good - who knew there was such a think as pineapple infused vodka?! And who knew it would be so darn good! Especially mixed with a little orange juice...

And who knew it would cause such a headache and extreme lethargy the next day?? OK, I DID know when I was drinking the third one, but by that time it was just too late. I had crossed the line from "hmm, this tastes really good" to "this stuff is like crack!".

It was worth it, though. It's been MONTHS since my husband and I went out with friends. I guess I can blog about that without feeling too too pathetic since know one knows who I am. We've just had such a tough time meeting people here despite the fact we moved a year and a half ago. I was just so happy to meet some fun people and go out on a Saturday night again. Yep, it was worth the hangover!

Friday, January 06, 2006

The Man Miracle

I am a genius!

I have to be, I found a foolproof way to get Husband to vacuum WITHOUT EVEN ASKING!

To be fair, he was happy in the past to vacuum whenever I asked - no pouting or muttering under his breath, at least not that I heard. But sometimes a gal likes to have things done without having to ask first.

Enter the amazing Man Miracle - the Dyson vacuum!

I am not kidding you! My husband is in love with this thing. I'm getting worried I'm going to wake up in the middle of the night and it's going to be in bed between us.

What he finds so irresistible is the clear plastic canister that allows him to see all the dirt and hair (1 lab + 2 cats = A LOT of hair) that he's sucking up. I can't really say why he finds this so fascinating but I sure am happy that he does! Best $400 we ever spent. I know it's pricey, but in our household (again, 1 lab and 2 cats!) we need a top notch vacuum.

What really cracks me up is that every time my husband uses the vacuum now, he goes around quoting the inventor (James Dyson) that does the commercials, (start fake British accent now) "I just think things should work properly." I love that he has such fun doing housework.

Now if I could only find a really cool gadget for cleaning bathrooms maybe I could get him to do that, too...

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Thursday Thirteen


Thirteen Things about Katherine

1. I hate crowds.

2. I am a jewelry whore. Love, love jewelry!

3. I like to read mysteries and usually read about 5 books a week.

4. I am shy. I find it hard to meet new people even though I want to.

5. I am a "trailing spouse". I have given up my career so my husband can have his which causes us to move every few years.

6. I used to live in a house in London that Sean Connery once lived in.

7. I am a serious cereal addict. My favorite "bad for you" cereal is Golden Grahams.

8. I love my dog Sampson more than my two cats.

9. I don't go to church anymore and am a little sad about it; but I have no respect left for the Catholic Church.

10. I am "famous" among friends for my chocolate almond toffee.

11. It drives me nutty when people say "anyways" instead of "anyway".

12. I love margaritas on the rocks with lots of salt and Grey Goose vodka with cranberry juice.

13. My ideal day would be sunny, 72 degrees with me sitting on the back patio reading a good book with Sampson lying by my side.


Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)


Check out Uisce's Thirteen Foods to avoid in 2006

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Goodbye

I woke up this morning thinking about Paul. He was 24 when he died 13 years ago.

He was my cousin. I can still picture his face and I'm glad. He was funny and handsome. He also had a lot of anger in him but I don't know why and now I'll never know.

He had wonderful parents, two sisters and a brother. He was living with his girlfriend and they had two young kids.

He had just bought a new car and was letting his friend drive it. He was sitting in the backseat with another friend, and a fourth friend was in the passenger seat. The guy driving was speeding. He was speeding on purpose. It was a game they all played. They would speed in areas where they knew cops liked to park and use radar to catch speeders.

Sure enough, they went speeding by a cop who pulled out after them with his lights flashing and siren screaming. Part of the game was to try and outrun the police, so of course they didn't stop. The friend drove faster and faster until he lost control. The car went off the road, hit a big tree and exploded.

The cop tried to help but the fire was too bad and he couldn't get the car door open. He said he thought he heard one of the boys screaming. I hope it wasn't Paul. They all died.

Paul's sisters were in another car behind him. They weren't speeding or trying to outrun the police. They didn't see Paul's car hit the tree and came upon the accident right after the car exploded. They didn't realize at first it was their brother's car and that everyone was inside dying.

All that was left of Paul was a foot. The funeral director wouldn't let Paul's mother see it because he was worried it would be too much for her. So, she insisted Paul's older brother look at the foot to make sure it was Paul's. Just in case. Just in case this could all be a nightmare.

Paul's mother died suddenly from a brain aneurism about 6 years ago.

Goodbye Paul, goodbye Rita. I miss you.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

One Stop Toliet

Canine Relief Station Having Watering Outlet with Internal Water Reservoir

I love it! Just what every dog needs - a fire hydrant that he can both pee on AND drink from. And of course you're going to want a big 'ol lick in the face after that, too. But wait, wouldn't firemen get confused? Which hydrant is the real deal...

Couldn't make this stuff up, wish I was that funny.

I saw this gem at
www.patentlysilly.com. Yes, there really is a patent for this gizmo.

Coming in a close second in the "Have Way Too Much Time On My Hands" Awards, the Doggie Poop Freeze Wand. You press a button and out comes some chemical that besides creating an even bigger hole in the ozone magically freezes your dog's poop! Cool, but what's the point? You still have to pick it up...I guess it would be good if your dog has diarrhea.


I think it should be marketed as a self defense spray. You could spray it in the mugger's eyes.

Happy Birthday Lava Lamps!


Woo hoo! Forty years ago this week lava lamps were created.

OK, unless you're a child of the 70s like me, this probably doesn't mean crap to you. But I remember being mesmerized by the oozing, floating lumps o' lava. I could stand in the store and watch the lava bubble and move forever until my mom dragged me away.

I don't know why I couldn't have a lava lamp, mom! Why was I denied?! Anyone out there have one? I want to hear about it.

Maybe I was really frugal with my allowance but I think they were too expensive for me. Or at least I'm sure that's what my "save every dime" mother told me to prevent me spending my money on one. I'm sure I would have been a much happier kid had I had one.

Way cool, or as JJ would say, "dy-no-mite!"

Monday, January 02, 2006

You're Fired!

You're seriously not gonna believe this!

I'm privileged to live in the same city as the headquarters for Scotts Fertilizer - you know, the company that rakes in the big bucks when you buy their product to make you lawn better than your neighbor's.

The CEO (an ex-military man, yes, this is important to the story) recently announced a No Smoking policy at the company. Big Deal, you say, lots of companies have them. Oh really? Do you know any other company that says you will be FIRED if you even smoke in your own home?!

Not kidding people! The employees have to submit to urine tests to prove they are not smoking anywhere on the planet. This of course has created quite the furor in our city and the Letters to the Editor are coming fast and furious. The majority want to strip the CEO naked and put their ciggies out on his flesh.

Now, I'm not a smoker but this seems like yet another bad idea in the mind of a dictator that's gone waaaaaay too far. The CEO has been babbling like a brook about how this will reduce health problems (which are apparently ALL smoking related) and therefore save money. Oh yes, here we go. It all comes down to money. Greedy SOB!

Then there was some gobbledy gook about getting in fighting shape and coming to the edge whatever the hell that means. What - are the Scotts Fertilizer employees being retained by the government to defend our country against terrorists now?

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Rockin' New Year's Eve for Losers

Well, the dog was asleep by 9pm, my husband made it until 10pm and I lasted until 11. I'm SURE I could have made it until midnight, but who wants to celebrate by themselves?

Besides, there was NOTHING on TV to keep me awake. I tried watching Ryan Seacrest - please. The five minutes I saw was of him in Times Square looking very cold and asking drunk revelers inane questions like, "How does it feel to be in Times Square on New Year's Eve?" Wow, he'll probably get some kind of broadcasting psuedo-journalism award for that crapola.

So, the cats (Hobbes, left, and Spenser) were the only ones awake in our house. Here are their Resolutions for 2006:
  1. 1. Hack up more hairballs, but only on the carpet. Never on the hardwood or tile.

2. Meow even more loudly at 5 am for food accompanied by scratching and launching ourselves at the bedroom door until it opens and we get yelled at.

3. Keep refusing to acknowledge in any way when our names are called.

4. Rub up against humans to get pet, and then without warning hiss, smack human with paw and try to bite. Repeat.

5. Sleep in dog's bed at ever opportunity, look annoyed when told to leave and start chewing on said bed.