Thursday, January 18, 2007

The Incredible Shrinking TV Dinner

GAH! God bless, people, what the fuck happened to Lean Cuisine? Have their portions gotten smaller or what? It's not just me, right? RIGHT?!

I had some Lean Cuisine chicken and green beans for lunch yesterday, oh excuse me, Grilled Chicken Medallions in a light, delicate yet delectable foo foo sauce brilliantly paired with sauteed French green beans (read, thin green beans since God forbid the French eat regular size green beans like the rest of the free world).

I added a side salad and some cherries and I'm frickin' starving here! My "Shape Up in January in Preparation for Swimsuit Try On Season" is going awry quickly. I had been doing really well except for the half pound Godiva chocolate binge followed a day later by the 8 Lindt truffle binge. I just don't know why the scale hasn't gone down...

In my defense, I cannot be held responsible for the chocolate binging. Husband and I had lunch out and I just wanted ONE (or maybe two) pieces of Godiva chocolate. When we entered the store we found the "after-holiday" chocolate sale in full swing! How could I just get one piece when I could get a BOX for 50% off?

And the Lindt deal? Well, my size 0 friend just happened to have bowls of Lindt truffles all over her damn house and kept urging me to eat them, because, you know, she just doesn't like chocolate. I couldn't wait for her to fall asleep so I could smear chocolate all over her tiny little face.

So, I guess I need to live by this chick's motto:

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body. But rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, Cosmo in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

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